In the pink or out of the blue?

Current mood: Fashion-police mode, with a sting
Current music: James Blunt

Halloween has come and gone, ghosts and ghouls have haunted the streets, and all manner of undead have walked the earth. But none were as scary as... The men in pink. [Cue bloodcurdling scream]

Yes, today's rant is a rather shallow complaint about men in pink shirts. I'm not talking about those pale pink collar-and-buttons shirts that can be cunningly offset with a charcoal grey suit to surprisingly good effect. I'm talking about casual t-shirts in bright pink. The kind of lurid pink commonly found on bubblegum, fluorescent highlighters or hallucinative elephants (as seen under the influence of too much vino). The kind of pink, in fact, to turn Barbie green with envy. Got the picture? Anyway, lately there have been a LOT of local men wearing t-shirts in this excessively vivid hue, even when it wasn't Halloween. Straight men, in fact. Once I spotted a guy with his girlfriend, both sporting matching garments of bright pink. It's like Ken trying to look like Barbie. Rather bizarre, and not a little annoying.

Now, before you put me down as sexist in a kind of 'boys wear blue, girls wear pink' way, let me explain that personally, I like blue a lot, and have practically everything in blue. I don't like pink all that much; certain shades can be quite pretty, but given the choice between a nice pink and a nice blue, I'd definitely go for the blue. So I admit that my prejudice against guys in pink stems primarily from my own dislike of extreme pinkness.

You won't catch me in a dress like this

[Picture found on the 'Emily the Strange' website]

I recently bought the James Blunt album, 'Back to Bedlam', although from an ad on the local HMV site it would appear that the album is called 'Back to Bed' (the 'lam' was amputated through lack of space). This new title is a far cry from the original, as sleep is generally impossible in a state of bedlam... Anyway, all I know about this relatively new British artist is that he's been everywhere, done everything, and is now singing about it. Apparently he was a captain in a reconnaissance unit at Kosovo, with his guitar bolted to the outside of his tank until he used it during quieter moments - now that's certainly not something everyone's done! His album's pretty good. While I might not agree with his choice of words in some of his songs, he does have some excellent tunes. Catchy mellow-rock music - watch out, Coldplay!

Today's Amazing Revelation: Wasps drink Coca-Cola! Yes, ladies and gentlemen, believe it or not, wasps enjoy sipping at this effervescent mixture of carbonic acid, phosphoric acid, sucrose and aqua. I saw this first-hand a few weekends ago, when I went on a boat trip with the people at work. This was just before the hot weather gave up and went south for the winter, when the sun was still shining, the sky was blue (or would've been, were it not for the slight haze) and the sea - this is in a remote, unpolluted part of Hong Kong - was a brilliant emerald green, and crystal clear. I managed to take this little photo on my phone.

Beautiful day, wasn't it? I had a great time paddling about in the shallower water near the beach, or sitting on the boat sketching the scenery. The only thistle in the rose-garden, as it were, was the invasion of our luncheon by a wasp. Or at least, it started with one wasp. This particular wasp came a-buzzing over the lovely food, finally settled on someone's cup of cola, and crawled in to have a little taste. Someone managed to trap it in there by covering the cup with a paper plate. Then along came Wasp no. 2, hot on the trail of Wasp no. 1 - probably following some kind of chemical message, along the lines of "I found food!", which the first wasp left in the air. I assume this is the case, as Wasp 2 hovered around then paused right next to the cup in which Wasp 1 was imprisoned. Someone managed to trap Wasp 2, then Wasp 3 came along to join the fun... I think we ended up trapping at least five wasps, although I'm not sure how we managed to get rid of them, since by this time I'd excused myself from the table, in search of some wasp-free open air...

Anyway, I promised the answers to the 'Guess the Proverb!' quiz I posted last week. I have received only one entry (I assume everyone else was too wrapped up in the sudoku puzzle to pay any attention) and he got it right, so well done Edsters! You'll get a personal message of congratulations from me. Everyone else gets a raspberry - thrrrrrrrrrrbt! Here are the answers:

1. Osculate and conciliate - Kiss and make up
2. Surveillance should precede saltation - Look before you leap
3. Pulchritude possesses solely cutaneous profundity - Beauty is only skin deep
4. Male cadavers are incapable of yielding testimony - Dead men tell no tales
[Funny how they didn't mention whether dead women tell tales or not!]
5. Emanating from a culinary vessel into a site of pyrogenic activity - Out of the frying pan and into the fire
6. Unwanted egotism prophesies the speedy effect of the force of gravity - Pride goes before the fall
7. All articles that coruscate with resplendence are not truly auriferous - All that glitters is not gold
[Note: This is only the popular version of the proverb. According to the excellent Edsters, the original phrase is "All that glisters is not gold", a quote from Shakespeare's 'The Merchant of Venice'.]
8. It is fruitless to become lachrymose over precipitately departed lacteal fluid - There's no use crying over spilt milk
9. Projecting short, loud noises erroneously towards the top of an arboreal plant - Barking up the wrong tree
10. The incontinently astirring rasorial vertebrate apprehends the vermicular invertebrate - The early bird catches the worm
11. A revolving lithic conglomerate accumulates no congeries of small, green, bryophytic plant - A rolling stone gathers no moss
12. Each mass of vapoury collection suspended in the firmament has an interior decoration of metallic hue - Every cloud has a silver lining
13. It hath been deemed unwise to calculate upon the quantity of junior poultry prior to the completion of proper incubation - Don’t count your chickens before they’ve hatched
14. It requires a number of people greater than one to perform a terpsichorean series of low dips and twisting steps on the toes - It takes two to tango
15. Exclusive dedication to necessitous chores without interludes of hedonistic diversion renders Jack a hebetudinous fellow - All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
16. Compounds of hydrogen and oxygen in the proportion of two to one that are without visible movement invariably tend to flow with profundity - Still waters run deep
17. A plethora of individuals with expertise in culinary techniques vitiate the potable concoction produced by steeping certain compatibles - Too many cooks spoil the broth
18. Missiles of ligneous or lithoidal consistency have the potential of fracturing my osseous structure, but appellations will eternally remain innocuous - Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me
19. Equine quadrupeds may indubitably be induced to approach that well-known standard of specific gravity, but not necessarily be induced to imbibe thereof - You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink
20. He who locks himself into the arms of Morpheus promptly at eventide and starts the day before it is officially announced by the rising sun, excels in physical fitness, increases in economic assets, and cerebrates with remarkable efficiency - Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise
[I prefer the Animaniacs version: 'Early to rise and early to bed, makes a man healthy, wealthy and dead']
21. The person presenting the ultimate cachinnation possesses thereby the optimal cachinnation - He who laughs last, laughs best

Got them all right? I found most of these from a site called 'Obfuscations', although in some cases I made some minor changes (for example when their words were misspelled or didn't seem to make sense), and I made up one of these myself. You can also find 'Fairy Tales for the Erudite' (as mentioned in the last post) and 'Nursery Rhymes for the Erudite' on the site:

http://www.obfuscations.com

My goodness, look at the time! 'Tis late and the thought of dinner beckons... Pip pip, peeps!